Tweet
Every conversation I have had with my line manager in the last two years leaves me devastated. I have been in public service for 40 years, and with the same authority for over 20 years. Two years ago, I swapped jobs at the request of a colleague and moved to a different location. I have since regretted that bitterly. I was promised a higher pay scale. The PR did not agree because the collective agreement does not allow it. My FGL tells me that I “did not arrive well” at the new workplace. I thought that was the reason why my higher pay scale was rejected. That's nonsense, of course. The rumor is in the air, but he doesn't want to tell me the source or more detailed information. I asked several colleagues. Nobody knows or wants to know anything about it. One colleague treats me very badly, but even he says that the rumor is not coming from him.
The day before yesterday, I had another personal conversation with the FGL. At the very end, he told me that an external consultant had complained about me. I had been intrusive! I had email contact with this external person about technical matters and asked for answers several times, most recently politely but firmly, but in no way intrusively. My boss asked me to clarify this with her because we still have to work together. This should take place in the context of a meeting scheduled in about 2 months. Of course, the meeting has a completely different reason. I didn't want to wait that long and called her the same day. She knew nothing of any misconduct towards her, I had not been intrusive and she had never complained about me. Very relieved, I told my boss that it was done. I had spoken to her and there must have been a misunderstanding. He then snapped at me that I had disobeyed his order. It had been agreed that I should only address her at the meeting. He almost shouted and was furious. I had thwarted his plans and, by the way, the previous boss had also had problems with me because I had disobeyed orders. The latter is not true at all. And now I no longer understand the world. It seems that there was no conflict at all. The only thing I disregarded was the timing. I wanted to clarify it immediately, although it was agreed otherwise. I have to be allowed to defend and protect myself. Why is he doing this to me? I am currently doing the work for two colleagues who are ill. All he can think of is: “You don't always have to take everything on yourself, let others do something.”
It was also nonsensical because it was something that I have to do as a substitute for the sick colleague. But why am I constantly being accused of misconduct when I have not done anything wrong. It does not do him any good.
I am so exhausted and at the end of my tether.